Hi guys! its been a while hehe. Berhabuk dah my blog hahahaha. I promised that I will post a lot of thing here soon. It just that I have been soooo busy with my assignments and so on! Too many thing to do because yeah this is my last semester of my degree in Finance hehe.
So if you guys look at the title of this post, probably you guys will start thinking "Oh minah ni putus cinta..bla..bla..blaa..". Oh no, actually no. Don't misunderstood ya hehe.
So here is the story, jeng jeng jeng....there is this guy, I will just call him as "K", I hope you guys don't mind. I have been talking to "K" like almost a several months. I mean talking through Whatsapp, Snapchat and so on. Yeah it is reaaaally fun talking to him. He is really really nice to me and the most important to me is that, he is understanding and he is not rude. I like how close he is with his families. Awwwwhh..
Oh ya, before you guys ask me how did I know him? I know him through social media@online. We were talking about everything and promised to meet someday. I am sooo excited for that day to come but sadly, we never meet in a real life. At first, I am so upset when he said "Oh tomorrow we can meet after dinner because I am a bit busy with my intern's works...". He have nooo idea I am so excited to meet him, I even can't sleep that day, thinking that "Oh what am I gonna wear, is the conversation between us gonna be awkward? and thereee go my speculations" hahahaha
Dang dangg dangg, finally that day camee. I am waiting for him to send a message like "Oh we gonna meet..bla bla.." but sadly he didn't, at all. I am waiting like a mom waiting for her son to come back after a years even tho she know it is impossible. Can you imagine that?? ugh
After 12a.m. in the morning, finally he sent me a message saying "Sorry tho, I can't make it". I was like............ok....okay....um ok....
I mean like I understand why, he was sooo busy, I shouldn't be so selfish. So I gave him a second chance, but yeah sadly he make the same mistakes, over and over againnnn. Not once, not twice, bukan tiga kali, but yeah you know.
End up I told myself, oh I think I dah fed up already. So yeah I fed up. I started try to not reply to his messages even tho its a bit ego and childish but I don't care at all. Until one day he asking "When can I meet you tho?" I was like, nooo I dah fed up its okay dudee.
I know it is a bit complicated but trust me it is really simple when it come to my real life. I can just meet him even tho I am mad at him but yeah the ego winnnn!! whateever. But back then, we were still talking and started to think that Oh mannn! I think I am in love with this guy. I'm in love with his craziness, his "Nicholas" dog and so on. I really wanted to know more about his sister "Sissy" that he used to talked about.
But what happened is that, at the time we started to realized our own feeling between each other, I confessed to him and he said he had a "thing" for me too but he kind of afraid that I can't accept him & so on. After we confessed with our own feeling to each other I felt so relieved, you know, like I can breathe so easily. (OMG, he said he like me too!)
Every time, he told me he was sick, accident and so on, HE HAVE NOOO IDEA I'M SO WORRIED! Whenever he was sick I told him to rest well, drink a lot of water and so on. It is not that I am clingy but I know that's the only thing that I can do to him because I do love him so much...You have no idea capital "K"..
Until one day, he told me he was sick because of hangover. I am so worried, I even can't sleep on that day thinking of him " Is he okay?, is he okay?" I keep asking myself even tho there is no answer for that. I told him to rest and so on.....and......
......and he didn't reply me. The next morning, he didn't send any message but the most sad part is that he can update his snapchat stories so cheerful and energetic. I was like...ok....maybe he will reply me later. But no.
Its been a weeks he didn't reply anything. End up, I saw something on his Facebook's feed (yeah I did stalked you capital "K"), he posted his picture with this girl..the moment I saw that picture, my heart beating sooo fast. Like there is a thunder, rain and tsunami at the same time...Actually I don't care about the very 'mesra' picture but the caption tho "#bae". You know that day, I don't even eat anything because of that hahaha. Okay that was too much lah Poyong, even my Mama told me to makan instead of thinking about what just happened.
Dear capital "K", if you ever read this one day, sorry for blogging about this because it was so obvious lah I am mentioned about your lovely dog and your sister. It just that maybe I am too upset with what just happened. If you think "So, what the hell is the real problem here? You are not even my girlfriend? I have my own decision...." Yeah I get that tho, I really really do...BUT, can you think back, please think properly, is it nice to play with someone's feeling? is it nice to left me confused like this?is it nice to tell someone that you love her and then you left her hanging with a questions?
I know that I am so stupid for thinking how nice, how cool could it be to be with you.
Okay, right now I have to focus on my studies, I know this is more important right now, this is for my future, I don't want to ruin it. I have to move on from this miserable thing that ever happened in my life. Thanks God for everything, you healed me from this really hurtful feeling.
And thanks God for making me smiling againn!!
Thanks guys for reading this very childish post hehe. I just want to throw everything hahahah.
P/S: This picture was taken last year.
